Communication skills!

The video is coming later today .. this is just a teaser :P



-- leedrag0n

There's no such thing rejection!

Hey guys!

It's me again, writing to you on a sunny saturday afternoon here in Israel. The weather is great, and I'm at the moment writing to you from the beach with my laptop as I got an inspiration to share with you this powerful concept that will change your attitude towards gaming forever.

This week I saw a great speech by the Israeli prime minister Benyamin Netanyahu in the american congress.. and while he was comparing the conflict between Israel and Palestine to those in Berlin and Prague in the late 90s, suddenly a protester .. who probably got disturbed by his words.. interrupted his speech and started screaming at him for talking nonsense.

Netanyahu's reply to this was nothing but pure genius: he took her objection, and TURNED IT AROUND TO HIS FAVOUR, by framing it to the audience in a new way that made him look great: He said "I'm honoured by these protesters, because you can't see them in governments like in Teheran or Tripoli. THIS IS REAL DEMOCRACY!", and as soon as he finished this sentence ... the entire audience stood up to gave him one of the strongest and raving applaudes the entire evening!

Now .. I realy want you to think about the implication of this!

I'm willing to bet that you are many times just WITHDRAWING your approaches because you simply haven't learned how to RESPOND to people and put them in place properly!

In fact, you've probably been trained to think like a loser = that if some woman throws objections at you, or "rejects" you .. that means the sarge is over, done, and you should walk away from there with your tail between your legs..

BULLSHIT!

Realize this: ANY response a woman gives you can be LEVERAGED and USED to YOUR FAVOUR!

This is one of the BIGGEST SKILLS in communication in general, and PU by itself.

In fact, there's always a chance that a hot woman WILL THROW SHIT LIKE THIS IN YOUR FACE at some point in the sarge, whether at the start or in the middle. An amateur or inexperienced PUA or AFC will perceive it as a "rejection" and will walk away.

However, A true master communicator will capitalize her response, not be phased by it, and then he will use it to HIS leverage to turn the whole thing around.

Let me give you an EXAMPLE to illustrate this:

Yesterday I was at Rothschild street in Tel Aviv .. and I noticed a nice 5-set so I started walking up to their direction ... Now apparently they have been hit before me by some amateur PUA .. but I didn't know it ... so anyways I come up to them and I start with a simple preopener: "Hey girls .. do you know of any good places around here?" ... Now, I didn't even get a chance to finish my sentence where suddenly one of the girls go: "WHAT? YOU ALSO WANT TO KNOW WHO LIES MORE? MEN OR WOMEN?" .. (LOL I can't believe people still use this opener!) .. I tried to turn this around to my favour by answering them: "Oh no ... they asked this you also ??" , and then one of the girls go : "YES. Now FUCK OFF!" in an angry voice ..

Now .. I'm willing to bet that most of you who are reading this are already perceiving this as a rejection LOL .. do you know why? its because you FEEL REJECTED .. and remember what I told you? That emotions blind logic? If you feel rejected that's YOUR PROBLEM. Work on it! See how I responded and you'll realize exactly what I'm saying..

Anyways I wasn't phased by it, so I can think about it logically. Now think about it on a logical level: It's 5 girls. Not one. So yeah, ONE girl shouts at you. But it doesn't mean that all of them agree with her! For all you know .. one of those girls may actually LIKE YOU!

So having this in mind, I replied to her like this:

Me: Oh no, they asked this you also?
Her: YES. Now FUCK OFF!
Me: Hey .. relax.. It's ok .. you're not the ONLY GIRL that haven't had sex for a while! In fact .. there are girls who didn't get it for longer than you! It's ok .. we hear you!

And as soon as I finish saying this, ALL OF HER GIRLS JUST BURST OUT LAUGHING LOUD, and she didn't know where to hide herself out of shame!!

Now what I did here was several things:

1. I didn't get emotionally affected by her response.
2. I used her response against her, to frame the whole situation in a different, more funny way. Framing her response as a result of sexual frustration.
3. It got all the girls laughing. And women are driven by emotions, not logic. If you get them to FEEL something, they flow with it!
4. Her friends LIKED ME for doing it. So now I'm 100% IN the set, because of the power of social proof.
5. The girl got submissive and quiet after this, probably because she was scared to get hit and humiliated by me once again like this in front of her friends LOL!

So you see guys .. this example just proves once again that THERE ARE NO LIMITATIONS to what you can possible achieve in this game. All the wrong perceptions and translations of reality are all in your head.

NOW will be the best time to just LET THEM GO!

Realy think about it for a while.

-- leedrag0n

Your State Issues Clarified!

Hey guys!

It has been a month since I wrote here, but I'm here again :-)

First I want to update you guys that I will be recording some more video tutorial modules soon, so if you liked the last ones I did (and I have got very good reviews on my rapport & chemistry video, Thanks guys!) then you can expect those coming soon.

But today I'm here with yet another very interesting state related post.
Actually, what I'm about to share with you today is going to blow your mind away. Literally!

Because after you'll finish reading this post, you will be dazzled and blown away about just how much you have been brainwashed about "confidence" your whole life. In fact, you may (hopefully) forget anything you ever thought you know about "confidence"!

Because you see.. everything you ever learned about "lack of confidence" or "low self esteem" was WRONG. There are no such concepts. We have been told LIES!

And now.. I'm going to reveal those lies to you, in this post, so you will begin to see the matrix for yourself.. and realize just how deep the rabbit hole really goes....


Part 1: Once upon a time there was a boy ...

.. and ever since he was a little kid he had things and activies that he LIKED and ENJOYED doing and things that he DISLIKED or HATED doing. Over the years the kid became really good at doing the things that he LIKED to do ... and he also became really good at avoiding doing the things that he DIDN'T LIKE to do ... so whenever he was supposed to do that activity or something that he didn't like to do ... he would learn to make a list of excuses to avoid doing it ... but that list was a result of the way he FELT about doing that activity! So... over the years he became VERY GOOD at making those excuses ... but did he know what creates it?

OK.. back here with me folks, I guess you can all relate to that story, right? :-)
I can already hear some of you reading this saying : "Oh yeah here's that preach again about me making excuses... I HEARD THAT ALREADY ... So what's the point?" ...

I'll tell you: MOST of your state issues that are related to women are subject of procrastination, or: trying to avoid something that you simply don't want to do!

YEP, that's what is REALLY is!

There is NO SUCH THING as "Fear of approach".
There is NO SUCH THING as "Low Self Esteem".
There is NO SUCH THING as "Lack of confidence".
And hell there is NO SUCH THING as "Loss of hope".

All of those things are just our own, WRONG TRANSLATIONS, to a generally simple neurological state of mind: a state of mind where TWO OPPOSITE DESIRES CONFLICT =

1. Your logical desire - what you KNOW on a logical level that you want, for example: "I want to approach this woman", or "I want to go out to sarge" or "I want to rehearse my tonality" or hell even "I want to clean my room!" ...

-- CONFLICTING WITH: --

2. The emotional state that is associated with doing this activity - what your SUBCONSCIOUS mind is telling you that it thinks about doing this, which is often the opposite of your logical desire, for example: "I don't want to approach this woman", or "I don't want to go out to sarge" or "I don't want to rehease my tonality" or "I don't want to clean my room".


How does this translates to the states of mind that you THINK you're experiencing? Well .. lets go deeper down the rabbit hole so you'll find out ...



Part 2: The psychologist say that I have a "Low self esteem"...

BULLSHIT!

LISTEN: Procrastination is a genuine human emotion. You've learned to do it ever since you were a little kid. It's part of the survival mechanism every human being inherited - it's the emotional "alarm" system that pushes you towards things that feel good, and pushes you away from things that may have unpleasant feelings associated with them.

Even if you logically KNOW that you have to go out to meet women, if your mind thinks different you're in a problem. And then what happends .. is that you PUSH yourself to go out ... but the feeling of "not wanting to do it" is still there. And then you carry that feeling with you to the field!

What does this result in? What everyone calls "bad state". You can't figure it out, and people start labelling it under many different names .. "Fear of approaching women", "Low self esteem", "Lack of confidence".. etc..

It's all just BULLSHIT, BULLSHIT and BULLSHIT!

It's all just YET another one of those human attempts to try and make sense of an emotional state of mind (or rationalize) of conflict between your emotional drive ("I don't want to be here") to your logical desire ("I want and I need to do this!")

Now.. here's my OWN story of how I concluded this...



Part 3: Once upon a time there was ME..

.. and I have always been quite a procrastinator on things that I didn't like to do, whether it's cleaning my house.. or taking the car to fix it.. and sometimes even to go and buy food in the supermarket!

And for the last 6 months or so I have been puzzled by a riddle that I couldn't yet find an answer to regarding my self: Why is my state of mind so unstable around women when I'm out there alone by myself ... -vs- ... my state being VERY stable when I'm out there with someone??

At first I thought it was something about my "Low self esteem", so I took a paper, wrote a bunch of positive beliefs about myself.. reaffirmed them for a while... FELT GREAT.. and then I went out to the field with it... it worked quite ok for a while but after a while I was back to my instability...

OK, next shot: I learned a bunch of NLP techniques for state design. I gave it a try as well! It also worked quite well for a while.. but after a while the instability came back..

OK, next thing I learned was stuff taken from vipassana meditation (equanimity, grounding etc). Worked well for a while but required alot of work.. and .. in the end you know what happend...

So .. I was really puzzled by this for quite a while. But then one day I really wondered... "Why isn't this happening to me when I'm with my friends?????".

I began studying, and exploring, and trying to understand the differences between how I behave when I'm with my friends -vs- how I behave when I'm without them. And I realized this:

1. If I can easily approach women when I'm around with my friends, it means that I DO NOT have any "Fear of approach"!
2. If I feel very good about myself when I'm around with friends, it means that I have NO PROBLEMS with my "Self Esteem"!
3. If I feel quite confident in myself when I'm around with friends, it means that I have confidence in myself!

So if I have all of those when I'm out there with SOMEONE... Then how come they all disappear when they are not around me??

AHA!!!!!

And that led me to the inevitable conclusion: being with friends is just MORE COMFORTABLE!


Part 4: Realizing it's realy about procrastination, NOT about confidence!

I can clearly tell the difference about going out to sarge with my friends -vs- me sarging solo by one small difference: If a friend calls me out, I'm almost always saying "YES" and I feel that I want to do it!

But if I had to take myself out by myself, ALL sorts of excuses will come out!

So there you have it - it's simply PROCRASTINATION!
Not fears, not lack of confidence, nothing.

And ... once I managed to neutralize the procrastination feeling and be able to go out to the field without it sitting in my veins .. then what do you know ... I'm unstoppable with women again!!!

Grasp it, eat it, and sleep on it.
If this relates to you - GREAT, If not, feel free to ask me anything.
Until my next post..

P.S: If you'll want to know how I got over the procrastination, shoot me a comment here and I will explain. You can feel free to comment and leave your feedback on this post anyways. I love hearing your feedback!

-- leedrag0n

PU for the dummies!

Hi everyone!

I want to talk a little bit about PU in general, lay out a few basic rules, attitudes and principles that I use and apply myself when I'm out to PU women, and discuss a few mindsets and beliefs that are important & useful.

Some of these guidelines are important so give those a good read.

Here we go:

Basic attitude for PU women - It is a game!

Do you remember how in computer games, or any game - whenever you play it, you're focused 100% on the game and your mind never wanders to other places? You want to have the same attitude with women!

The whole process of approaching a woman, engaging her in a conversation, connecting with her, and then seducing her to either fall in love with you or have sex with you is an art. Not a fixed thing, and it can change with every woman. It's more like .. playing music! And because of this nature, it must be played from an outcome disoriented and fun place.

You only get good and better in this game by gaining experience, and any time you game a woman you learn something.

Basic understanding for human interactions - It's possible to connect with EVERY person!

Every woman is first of all a person.

And every person is a unique individual.

As such, that means that she is conditioned to respond to specific types of communications presented to her, has specific motives that drive her, and has certain behaviours or topics of conversation that she likes. If you can find those, you're very likely to succeed in creating a strong connection with her.

In order to find those, you need to carefully listen, observe, and study her reactions. This means that you need to collect this information about her. The only way to do it, is by being outwardly focused on her and paying attention to how she responses and what drives her.

And in order to do that, you must operate by the next "set in stone" rule for interacting with women:

Set in stone RULE for interacting with women - If you CAN'T pay attention on HER and how she responds - DON'T GAME HER!

This is a highly crucial "set in stone" rule for interacting with women.

Consider the following metaphor: a boxer entering the ring with his eyes folded so he can't see anything. He can't study his opponent, and he can't know when he hits or not. If he throws a few punches, yeah he might "hit" some once in a while, but he will most probably miss most .. and he won't know whether he's doing progress in the match or not ..

In analogy, when you approach a woman and your attention is not on her, you're going to miss interest signs she gives you, you're going to miss what's her favorite communicating style, you're going to miss the things that drive her or the things she responds most strongly to, you're going to miss the communication she presents to you that can allow you to "mirror" her and increase the rapport .... when you operate this way you're most likely to just "get lucky" with her, if she's realy interested in you and she's doing half the work for you!

Basic mindset for gaming women - There is no such thing "rejection", only feedback about what DOESN'T work on her!

As I stated above, it's possible to connect with every girl, and every girl is conditioned to respond positively to SOMETHING .. but no one guarantees you that you'll succeed in finding that "something" right on your first attempt of interacting with her!

If you didn't succeed on your first attempt though, it doesn't mean anything. All that it means is that what you tried, with this girl, at this time, just didn't work .. and you might try a different strategy next time and it might work.

Changing tactics, strategies and methods are a good thing to have at your disposal.

Because EVERY girl will respond to SOMETHING .. and the only way to find out what will work is to try something and pay attention to how she responds to it. If you get a positive response (she opens up, smiles, starts connecting with you, fucks you etc), then you know you're on the right track .. if not, then you know you're off the track and you may change the strategy and try again this time, or next time.

Another thing you can play with is your non-verbal communication.

So here's another important thing to know about human interactions..

Another basic understanding for human interactions - Non verbal communications play a role!

And when I say "non verbal", I mean more to as "the character" you enter into, and i'll explain.

You may have been used to communicate in a special and unique way all your life. That is "yourself".

As I said, every girl is conditioned to respond to a specific type of communication presented her, and that mostly means: "the character" that you enter into. If you are the quiet guy type, this may fail to work on some women who are more into the "happy party guy" type ... on the other hand if you're the "happy party guy" type, this may fail on some women who are more into the "masculine relaxed guy" type.

So your ability to play with these characters, or to be flexible enough in your communication, is what will open for you the possibility to connect with every girl. Once you've created the connection with the other person, you can slowly slide back to be "yourself" although you're mindful as to what she responds best to.

Again, the only way to find out is by trying many different angles and pay attention and notice to what she responds best!

"Open your mind, and your ass will follow .."

I hope this information have been helpful to you.

-- leedrag0n

Always remember this!

Whenever you're confused, in doubt, or in lack of motivation to go out and meet women, always remember this:

THERE ARE women out there who are HOT, FUN, COOL, FRIENDLY and who WANT TO MEET YOU and ENJOY WITH YOU. You just have to FIND THEM!

There are also women out there who are cold, turned off, unfriendly, not nice, unreal, frigid, frustrated, or even boring people that you DON'T want to meet!

In what percentages you will find each of those? No one knows.

But you should just always remember that the kind of women you're looking for DO EXIST.

Now go find & them!

-- leedrag0n

How to improve your tonality

Hey guys.

If you remember, a few posts ago I talked about "Attraction" that's built up of looks, vibe and behaviour, and I promised there that I will make a post about tips to improve your tonality, so here's the post as I promised!

In this post I'll give you tips and drills (vocal exercises) that will help you improve your tonality which, as a side bonuis, will improve the vibe you create in your communication (because Tonality is a major aspect of vibe!).

So let's start!

How I got to improve my own voice

I used to have a very weak voice normally. Maybe due to my work as a programmer (where I was barely speaking) or maybe due to just bad habits of operating my voice, but I had a voice that could barely be heard and was airy and breathy. At some point I realized that my voice could be impacting the way I am perceived by others (And these things do affect other people unconsciously. We could go all philosophical and say that a great "seducer" can get women even with bad looks, vibe, and behaviour. I could agree to it on some level, but the reality is that MOST people, and women, are VERY SHALLOW as far as the first impression goes, and I'm only talking about the FIRST IMPRESSION. A good first impression gets them hooked up, a bad first impression will get most to want to leave. this is reality!) so I decided to start working on it.

The first thing I noticed about my voice, was that everytime I went out to a club .. maybe due to the loud music and my need to make my voice sound louder inside those places .. when I came out of the club my voice would suddenly open-up and be realy loud, clean, and resonant! This would usually last for a couple of days, before it got back to the normal weak, breathy voice.

I posted a question about this in a medical forum that has to deal with voice problems, and one of the doctors there suggested me that the change in my voice happens due to changes in my habits of controlling my voice, that gets changed when I'm in a club environment to fit-in. When I leave the club, because I've unconsciously trained my voice for about an hour or so inside the club, I get out and it stays the same for a couple of days before it gets back to it's normal patterns.

This meant to me that I have to find ways to practice and train my voice so it'll be resonant, clean and loud even on a daily basis. Now i'll share with you the insights I have come with, and the vocal exercises I've managed to practice to maintain my voice as it is ..

Vocal drill #1 : Create Resistance

If your voice is weak, it may be because youre "voice muscles" are weak and not used. Same as it was with me. When I went to a club, because of the loud volume, I had to push my voice stronger to get it to be heard. As a return, this strengthened my loudness. You can achieve the same affect without going to a club, but by creating resistance to your voice - so you'll have to push it stronger to be heard. Makes sense, no?

You do it by taking a straw ("קשית") and putting it in your mouth, and then start "uuhhhh"ing vocal tones through it (like a musical octave up and down). The straw creates resistance because the voice has to be tunneled through a small tiny air space, and in return it presses the vocal cords so when you release it, your voice becomes stronger.

Here's a clip that illustrates it:

Extra tip: You can put your finger on the far side of the straw, to cover the open spot in order to add even more resistance to your voice.

Vocal drill #2: Make your vocal cords vibrate (Warm-up / "Lip Bubble")

Another aspect of creating your voice is whether or not the vocal cords actually vibrate when you create a sound. In order to get them to vibrate, you use a simple exercise called "Lip Bubble".

Here's a video that illustrates this:

Vocal drill #3: Open your throat up

Another aspect of a good, clean and resonant voice is whether your throat & neck muslces are relaxed and releived. A tensed throat or neck causes the voice box (aka "Larynx") to move away and the air will get cut off, which will make it more difficult to get a voice out and you'll have to invest more energy to it. You want the entire area of your throat & neck to be relaxed and that way the voice will come up easier, the voice box will stay in it's place and therefore the voice will come out nice, clean and resonant.

Here's a video to illustrate it:

Another great video with explanation:

Check out this guy's videos, his name is Roger Burnley and he has very good videos and explains the whole voice creation process in a very interesting way and has great exercises.

You can check his channel on youtube at this link.

Here's a nice video with his explanation of how the voice creation process works:

Final note:

That's it for this post!

Start practicing your tonality improving, and feel free to reply and share your experiences.

-- leedrag0n

Values, Values system & Self-Definition

Hey all.

I want to share here an inner insight that I have recently discovered about myself after some deep soul searching. It has to do about a discovery of how I was unconsciously used to define my own value as a person based on an attractive woman's responses towards me.

If you find that you relate to this subject, feel free to read on and share your thoughts at the end of this post.

I know that it sounds completely illogical. It was for me too.

I'm quite sure that every one of us have some areas in his life that are governed by illogical and irrational ways of thinking and perceiving things that may prevent him from being able to feel good or at ease around them, and as a result - toughens his ability to succeed and/or enjoy them. It's only when you become aware of these irrational thought patterns where they can be intervented, changed, and maybe fixed for good.

I guess that real world examples would help understanding better exactly what I'm talking about.

So let's start with a subject I like: sports, for instance. I like to play soccer.

I noticed that in the neighbourhood where we play soccer, there are some people who will take losses very very personally and seriously. So much, infact, that they won't even be able to stay there any more and they'll just have to go home to relax. Does it make sense??? I mean, we are there to play and enjoy and have fun playing football, and a person's entire mood can immediately change 180 degrees from complete joy to horrible disaster only because his team lost. It doesn't make sense. When I lose a game, I don't take it this personally. I mean, it's just a game. No big deal. But for those people, it's everything. It's not logical right?

Another example is how some folks can perceive wealthy people with lots of money.

I personally came from a family where my father and mother used to hang out with so called "high society" people. People with lots of money, industry leaders etc. I learned that these people are no different than me and you, and nobody of them is better than you or me only because he has money. Some of them are complete idiots who just seem to have a "good mouth" and know how to be diplomats and talk. Whenever you face them with a question that requires depth and a real brain, many of them get lost. I know it. So I can walk up and meet up with people who are millionaires or famous celebs and to just be myself as I am naturally and not even count their presence. I have a friend who couldn't do it, up until recently. He told me that whenever he was about to meet a realy wealthy person, he'd start to shake and get nervous. I thought about it and said .. but how could it be? IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE!! It was in his world though. Because in his own value system, a person with a lot of money is considered a god.

And that brings me back to my own example, and how I got this insight.

Recently, I have been working my ass on a big project. It's my own creation.

This project brings alot of joy and happiness to my life, I enjoy every minute of working on it, and even though it caused me to be in the field less - it made me feel proud as a person on something I create, and it made me feel great about myself as well. Then one day, I was walking out of my house to do my regular walk around the city, feeling great and delightful about myself. It all went so fine ... until one moment when I saw this attractive girl coming in front of me. She was talking on her cellphone. As she passed near me, I started looking at her.. hoping that she looks back at me... but she didn't. And at that moment, my entire mood changed 180 degrees. From complete joy, proud of myself, good about myself - to feeling horrible, disasterous, frustrated and what not!

This was a breakthrough moment for me, because .. perhaps for the first time in my life .. I became fully aware to just how powerfully women's responses affected me. And I didn't even approached her! I just looked at her, and she didn't reciprocated back... and that by itself hurted me in a very deep and emotional level... and just as I told you here, I realized at that moment - THAT IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE!!

IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE AT ALL !!!

How can I walk out my door ... feeling so great about myself, about what I've created, what I worked my ass on with complete joy of ... and BECAUSE OF A WOMAN'S LOOK ... a woman who just talked on her phone ... who I don't even know .... to come back home so devastated ???

This didn't make sense to me at all!!

And exactly because of that - I knew that I MUST find a way to answer this question.

So I started digging down the surface of my mind. I had to find the root for this cause.

No more NLP tricks of altering my emotions, No more reframes, No more affirmations .. I knew that this is something deep .. and I was determined to find it out....

Before I tell you how I found the big answer .. (and btw: all the answers to all the questions are already inside of you) .. let me tell you something funny about us, humans.

We all think that we are SO smart, right?

I believe that when we are kids, we make alot of illogical conclusions that are based on our irrational understanding of the world back then, that later these conclusions just sink down the surface and into our subconscious and become thought patterns that we live with. These thought patterns are what guides us through life, what creates our most powerful emotions, and you are almost never aware of them until one day you realize, just as I did, that something is completely wrong and illogical about your feelings and you must figure out what it is.

So I asked the question.

Thankfully, I have great buddies who I can share my thoughts with, and one by one they started providing me directions & clues as to what it could be, that eventually led me to the answer.

The first buddy who I talked with, is a friend of mine from the football. He is also the guy that I told you who used to be nervous around wealthy people. I talked with him about this subject, and this is how he shared with me his past fear of wealthy people. In the end of my conversation with him, we came to the conclusion that I attached very high value and importance to a woman only because she's attractive to me. So he asked me: "Why do you give so much value to an attractive girl?". Answering this question by itself was impossible... because I told him: it doesn't make any sense to attach so much value to a girl only because she's attractive!

This dropped the first coin to my head. And now here's the next one.

I had a conversation later with my mother. I thought that listening to a female's perspective may enlighten me. She was completely shocked by everything I was saying ... "You should NEVER feel less than a woman just because she's pretty!" ... and then she started telling me of this TV show that she watches called "Let's marry". Moms just love these shows. In every show they bring a guy and a girl that are supposed meet in the end of the show if everything goes well and they like each other. The show is hosted by a female host, a female astrologist and a female psychologist that navigate, analyze and suggest ideas to both the guy and the girl. There was one show where they brought a female girl who looks like a porn star but she was obvisouly not a real person. Her entire personality was an act. She would raise her nose, talk with an exaggerated way of speech, and brushed her hair. And both the host, the astrologist, the psychologist AND my mother (And i'm sure that lots of other females who watched the show) - they could all see how unauthentic she is. How she is just an act. But the guy COULDN'T SEE IT! And even though both the host, both the astrologist, and the psychologist - all told him that she's not for him, that she is a dominative person, that she's into sadistic stuff - he chose her! And this dropped a second coin in my mind ... could it be that what we observe externally is a deception???

The third coin came from a best friend of mine. He's a natural.

I shared my thoughts as well with him, and then he told me how it reminded me of something that happend to him. One day, he met this buddy of his who also brought a girl that he knows. She's a model. Between friends he tried chatting with her up, and she completely ignored him (Mind you: this is NOT a cold approach. She ignored him within a social circle setting!) and talked to his buddy, and asked the buddy question about my friend as if he's not there (Standoffish). Then, she told them both how she never goes out with a guy unless he spends 3000 shekels on her in an evening (Whore). And finally, he told me how one day he was working and he saw her walking down the street, so he pointed at her for his work colleague so he can see who is that girl, when she saw him she gave him the "fuck off" finger. After this story, I couldn't feel anything but disgust towards her. Then my friend asked me if i want to see her picture, so I said sure. He sent me her picture. And even though she is a model, and she will be very attractive to many men - AFTER I KNEW HOW HER SHITTY PERSONALITY REAL IS, I COULDN'T FIND ANYTHING ATTRACTIVE IN HER! SHE DISGUSTED ME FROM HEAD TO BONES!!!

This was interesting .... I knew her personality is shitty before I saw her, so then when I saw her I couldn't find anything attractive in her cause I knew she's disgusting as a person... but in the real world situations I only see their beauty first .... could I be up to something soon??

And then, the final coin that hit the nail came from a buddy who I haven't talked with for a while.

I shared my story with him as well, and he told me how he learned this technique that is taken from cognitive psychology, that he learned in his book by a doctor, about how to "dig into deep emotions". He started investigating me for a while, I cooperated. At some point we came to a conclusion that I feel inadequate for realy attractive women. So he asked me: "Why do you feel inadequate?", and he told me to sit down and realy think deep on this question. And any answer that comes up in the sort of "I feel X" - I should dig even further below until I find the answer.

Surprisingly enough, this has led me to a bottom root question: "Why do I give such importance to attractive women's reactions towards me?". And then, having remembered all the above, I came to a surprise answer. A very logical answer, that I couldn't think of because my thinking was illogical:

If I approach a beautiful woman and she responds rudely towards me ... well.. THAT is NOT a reaction of a person who is realy beautiful. One that has inner beauty as well. A beautiful person will NEVER respond rudely and harshly to you, no matter if you're attractive to him or not. I know that I, personally, even if a fat and disgusting chick approached me, I'd be nice towards her.

So these girls who respond rudely are NOT good people. You saw it with my natural friend's example.

They are NOT beautiful people from the inside. So now the question I had to ask myself was:

HOW CAN I GIVE SUCH UNHAPPY, UNREAL, AND UNPRETTY PEOPLE DECIDE WHO I AM AND WHAT I'M WORTH???????????

WHO THE FUCK ARE THEY TO DECIDE IT????????????

WHY SHOULD I BE ASHAME OF WHO I AM, BECAUSE OF SUCH PEOPLE ???????

ME, SUCH A REAL, AUTHENTIC GUY, SMART, ATTRACTIVE ... AND LET ALL THIS GO DOWN THE DRAIN BECAUSE OF SUCH LOSERS??????

THEM???????????? PFFFFFFF......

And yes, you can't imagine how angry I was that I've let all these attractive women, all these years, women who may have only had OUTER attractiveness but definitely didn't have any INNER attractiveness ... how could I have let THEM tell me who I am???????

I was realy pissed off when I found this out, and I still am up until this moment.

I don't think that ANYONE has ANY RIGHT to define who you are as a person. No matter how rich, famous, attractive or social he is.

FUCK THEM, WHO THE FUCK ARE THEY?

-- leedrag0n