Ego & Insecurities

Have you ever noticed of this self-destroying mechanism inside your mind called "EGO" ?

Yeah this autopilot emotional system designed to "save" you from any embarrassing, humiliating or even damaging social reactions from others ?

Notice for a second the last thing i said above ... "autopilot emotional system designed to keep you safe from harsh social reactions".

Alot of this has been in your mind since age 4 already, and in general its not really a bad thing to have this mechanism !

You WILL get caught by the police and maybe even sent to jail if you suddenly decided to go out naked tommorow to your local mall to do shoppings or even approach women LOL.

So gotta give a credit to it though - this "EGO" mechanism is actually there to not only protect you but to also GUIDE you at which way is right way to go.

However, the real problem begins when this mechanism becomes too strong, or over the normal limits. Imagine to yourself for a second that the real purpose of the EGO mechanism was to create a transparent glass bubble shell over each individual. The person has this bubble in which inside of it he's protected and assured his security YET he can still see things through it, talk to people and even do everyday normal activities, he may still get hurt every here and there but overall he has basic protection.

The problem begins when ABOVE the normal transparent shell the mechanism created another huge dark plastic bubble shell. So now the person has TWO SHELLS - the basic transparent one, and another untransparent shell above it. This now gives the person what i call "over-protection". Sure, no way he's gonna get hurt this way, but he's also going to miss alot of life because he can't really be able to even SEE anything now, since he's over protected.

....

In order to have a hot girlfriend, maybe even have the ability to date hot women here and then, hell even have a CHANCE at them by taking their phone numbers even, whatever - In other words to have any chance with any woman of YOUR desire, you will have to make a choice between taking the red pill (Letting go of your "EGO" completely, and be prepared and ready to get alot of "rejections" or harsh social reactions from people) and take your "shell" completely off and be exposed to social harshness, or take the blue pill - go back to your bed and keep living life under your protective shells and make no moves, initiate nothing, and in return - you'll get NOTHING.

How can i say so ?

Because many of the "protective" EGO autopilots are not really in your favor here.
According to your "EGO", the "right" place to meet women is in work, school, or social circles.
The "right" way to meet women is to be introduced to them by someone you both know (A girl or a guy, whatever) , and even then you STILL have to initiate some moves, initiate a phone numbers exchange, initiate a date etc, etc. Yeah, it is "safer" and more protective, but then you are dependent on "luck" or others ... and ... are the girls you meet in these meetings really are YOUR types ?

Have you ever felt stuck by an inability to go and talk to a woman YOU desire and just couldn't figure out WHY it happends like this ? I've got news for you - It WAS your "EGO" that has blocked you - your autopilot emotional system created to protect you from harsh social reactions. Great at protecting you from illusional social "pain", great also at keeping the women of your desires away from your reach. Am i the only one smelling a hidden "formula" for success here ? ;-)

Back to the basics : Society first have teached women that it is men's job to initiate the meeting.
Then it was every girl's life experiences that taught her this - The HOTTER the girl was, the more guys were approaching her / being introduced to, hence - the LESS desire she had to actually go and initiate moves by herself. Why should she ? She's good looking, yeah she may see a guy she really likes who makes no move and be disappointed by it, but she'll keep on living and she knows the other day she may still meet someone.

So you see, i just got you realizing here that this "EGO" you have, which is a great thing really as it keeps society as a well structured world of human beings, can really be a damaging thing when it comes to meeting people, and ESPECIALLY meeting women of your choice.

So what can we do here ?

A couple of important realizations.

First, wake up and realize it is OK for you to try and initiate an introduction / meeting with a woman of your choice. Other people (especially guys who are after her) may not like it, but she WILL LOVE it !!! Even if she has no guts to show it right now, Even if you really weren't her type, Even if she really wasn't prepared for it - she WILL go home and think about it in a positive light.

Second point here, important one - you have to let go of the "EGO", once again mentioned.
Sometimes you will run into strange and wierd reactions, sometimes women will be standoffish on you, sometimes women will even try to HURT you and humiliate you when your original goal was to actually get them PLEASED. All those things your "EGO" mechanism was designed to protect you from. You cant predict these reactions, but you also can't escape them or you will be back to square one and not meeting women of your desire again. A BIG thing here is to realize that these reactions are nothing personal on YOU - They are just emotional autopilot responses these women throw out, not on purpose !! Sometimes the woman is in a hurry, other times the woman is married and stuck on the guy 100%, other times the woman simply is in a bad or even depressed mood, some women even have social fears of strangers. NOTHING personal. drop the ego. you'll have to be willing to go through such reactions in order to have ANY chance of getting women of your desire, as mentioned above.

And final point number Three - These reactions will NOT kill you !
Yep, even if it was the worst rejection in the world you will walk out of there still alive, it may feel a bit harsh but it is just a feeling, and that is natural. emotions have a tendency to be transmitted from one person to another, so if she responded harshly to YOUR flattering approach, chances are that at some point in time some other guy responded exactly the same on HER, so now that you came she has a chance to transmit it to you. Again, nothing personal.
Humans are excessively stupid animals when it comes to emotions, as i already explained before.
At the end of the day its just a temporary emotion being transmitted to you by a girl, it doesnt say anything on who you are as a person because SHE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW YOU !

and with those you are now ready to let go of your ego and start enjoying life more.


A Word about insecurities

So the "ego" was the autopilot emotional system to protect you from harsh social reactions.
We now understand its bullshit and letting it go is the best choice you can ever make towards meeting the women of your desires.

Lets talk abit about insecurities.

Insecurities are another part of the "Ego" mechanism you have to let go of - the part trying to protect you from harsh social reactions towards qualities that exists inside of you.

If it ever happend to you in the past that people used to make fun of your moves, your speech, your qualities, hobbies, dreams or even goals, your ego mechanism will be there for the rescue of course by providing you protection from harsh social reactions to your inner abilities and sense of being.

And we all know this can be quite annoying at times really.

So what can be done here in order to let it all go ?

Couple of realizations again :

1. Yes you may not be an ideal person, but you are who you are and you need to appreciate it. Nobody can ever be ideal, every human being have his own faults. Those who haven't yet internalized it are real morons, and those who laugh at other's faults are real losers.

2. You can't ever become someone you are not really mentally, so don't even try to act in other ways that ain't who you genuinely are just because someone said that you "aren't masculine enough" or that you "aren't tall enough". Yeah of course things CAN be done in order to improve aspects in your life but don't ever try to adopt a behaviour that just isn't you. So if someone told you that you aren't good enough, unless it is a good friend who knows you really well - FUCK THEM. Nobody knows you the way you REALLY are.

3. Go over the "Confidence" post again and answer the question there to yourself.

4. Be genuine. The second biggest compliment you can give a woman other than the initial approach is to come and present yourself as who you genuinely really are. Honesty and authenticity are probably the two most attractive qualities you can ever present to her as a man. Forget about the bullshit "player" illusion. Being a player means knowing how to use emotions as a play tools to direct her attention and feeling, nothing else. It certainely isn't being a fake guy.

--leedrag0n

Social Confidence

Ok lets start by asking you this simple question ..

How do most people usually hook up with sexual partners, aka "relationships" in the standard socially acceptable ways ?

Men & women meet at school, workplaces, college or through their social circles.

A woman hooks up with an available man, they go out for several dates.

She gets to "know" him first by going out with him for 4 or 5 dates, and gets to test him for compliance with money & social status first, and only once she knows him and knows he's a socially acceptable partner, she feels it is right to sleep with him.

On the other hand, women will sleep way faster with guys who are considered by many to be "players" or "naturals", so whats the catch here ?

The catch here is the difference between going along with the rules of society, and going against them.

"Players" or "Naturals" all share one unique characteristic if you get to closely examine them - they don't give a shit at social rules, or at "what others think about them" AT ALL. Some people call them jerks, others call them arrogant, others call them selfish etc etc. but the bottom line is - they get the women to sleep with them WAY FASTER than other ordinary guys would have to go out with them and pay for their dinners etc etc.

Why is this important to know ?

Because like i was explaining in the previous post you may have already realised - women DO want sex just as much as we do, and get to think about it way more than us. Every woman at some level feels like a repressed sexual animal who has to keep on pretending an act that she hates sex and that is torture for them really. That is because they have to follow social rules in order to be socially accepted, so that other people will accept them.

So whats the deal with the player / natural / jerk / arrogant dude LOL ?

The player doesn't give a fuck at the "social rules", and women can sense it in him.

Thus - it makes WOMEN feel more comfortable at breaking the "rules" themselves, it gives them a chance to break free of the social binds they have upon them and fulfill their most wanted lust and cravings for sex, without having to feel guilty about it.


Does this makes sense ?

Every woman would crave for instant sex with a man, this is their fantasy.

I goes against "social rules" - it is considered a social "crime" for a woman to act so fast on her desire for sex with an attractive man.

But talking about crimes , think about the following metaphor for a second.

Two friends of yours offer you to go to and try steal a stripper from a strip club.

One of them is a coward and is afraid of big guys (like the bouncer) and you know it.
The other one is not scared of anything, he pisses over people and makes them look like little clowns in a cartoon movie.

Which one of these two friends, you will feel more comfortable to cooperate with ?

Think about that now, as it comes to women.

On the other hand they have sex, which they want for and crave for all the time.
Two guys approach them.

One guy is a social coward, has a high status job and all but he's concerned about what others will think about him making the moves.
The other one doesnt give a fuck at the rules, does whatever he wants and makes other people look like clowns compared to him.

Which one of them she will feel more comfortable "breaking the rules" of sex with ?

.......

Do you have social confidence ?
Do you worry about the social rules or what others will think about you ?

If so , ask yourself - Why ?
Has it ever gotten you the results you wanted ?
Or did it always kept you frustrated and angry ?

If so , then it is about time for you to start breaking the rules.

Worst thing that can happend for you is you'll start getting laid.

--leedrag0n

Sexuality explained

Back to the core stuff here, but more advanced this time.

Warning here : If you are still novice in the game and haven't actually had SEX or even relationship with women, then this article will probably make no sense to you and even scare you, so i really don't recommend you to read it and instead get experienced in sexuality first before you could read on. Otherwise if you are novice and still keep reading though, do not blaim me if you don't understand something later on as you read it.

Ok lets start basic core and go up the ladder.

Why did nature provide 2 genders for every animal type = Male & Female ?
What is the first foremost biological need male and female has from each other ?

Its replication & survival.
Attraction between males & females is a biological drive to bring babies at its CORE level.

Lets talk a bit about relationships for a moment.
It is now more and more known that GOOD SEX is a crucial part of successful and happy relationship.
Nonetheless it is also known today that sex is a physical drive that exists in women too.

Why do i say all this ?
It is because you have to realize that the bottom line : what women NEED from us the most is sex and good sex. To be FUCKED, to say short. Not the rich salary, not the good-looking figure, not "love" etc. - all of those are just societal induced EXCUSES people believe in.

How do i know all of this ?

Well im a good looking guy, like you read in my profile im a highly skilled software programmer, you can conclude from that i have a respected job. Im not a boring person you might have figured it out already from reading all my previous posts. Im quite open and social. I have absolutely no problem with "paying" for women on dates.

You would probably think i have all it takes to be successful with the ladies.
Well maybe i do have it now, but in the past i used to give women a wonderful time together and in 90% or even more of the times, dates stopped after the first one if i didn't at least have a good makeout with the girl. Something was missing and i couldn't figure out what.

In all the times in the past where i did get sexually intimate with women - kiss, makeout or even sex, they wanted to stay in touch, and even more - they would more than often INITIATE MEETS THEMSELVES !

This by itself led me to a personal conclusion about what is it that women REALLY look for in us.

I finally realized the point exactly when i got exposed to female sexuality articles and female fantasies forums. I then realized that women are not only SEXUAL just like us, they are even way more aggressive than us even !

While men usually think they should talk & charm the girl first and be "good" to her and then try to go intimate with her, women themselves have a completely different view of sex in their own eyes. Women's fantasies are straight to the point - no bullshitting talk. A stranger guy approaches her middle of the day and he just bends her down and fuck her in the ass.
Not something i would suggest you to try though, as it will be considered rape.

Many men think women are holy angels, the truth is deep inside even the cutest of women are way more slutty and perverted than we are even. They only act it outside to the world because this is how they were "taught" from an early age. In reality though, this is torture for them.

Women masturbate just as much if not even more than we are.
They use dildos, candles, cucumbers and lots of other stuff, yet they know very well that there is nothing that can be compared to the REAL thing.

Women can LIKE you and maybe even ADMIRE you if you operate by society's expectations.
But women will not FUCK you if you don't try to fuck them yourself.
Women will never see you as a potential lover if you don't actually TRY to fuck them, what they fantasize, what they mostly lust for and desire - a guy who actually comes and fuck them. A sexual partner to share sex with, a replacement for their hands & dildos - The REAL thing.

This is what they FANTASIZE of and lust for the most !

Come and give them what they really want from you.
If she doesn't see you as a potential sexual partner, she has nothing to do with you really.

All the rest, is just society induced excuses you shouldn't even bother with.

"Boyfriend"

You : "Hey youre a really fun person, lets hang out sometime !"
Her : "I have a boyfriend"

Ahhh , not that BOYFRIEND again !!

The so familiar phrase women often use that immediately puts us down, gets all the air out of the baloon, and makes us outright want to give it up.

If you are intimidated or let down by the boyfriend excuse, hopefully your ways of thinking will change once you've done reading this post.

Lets first talk a little bit about the way women think & feel sexually.

It is now more than ever known that women think and operate sexually EXACTLY like us men, if not more even. Women have lust and desire for sex, masturbate, have sexual fantasies and desire for multiple sexual partners as well.

They are TAUGHT, however, since an early age that this is wrong though - that it is "perverted" or "slutty" to not only act on their sexual desires but sometimes to even THINK about them.

Some women will often catch themselves fantasizing about a dick of a stranger going down their throat middle of the day and immediately have an inner voice pop up that tells them to STOP it because its "dirty".

Those sexual thoughts never leave them though and keep coming back because they are PART of a normal human's sexuality. Which makes the problem even WORSE when you think about it - makes them actually feel even WORSE about themselves, as dirty little whores who have been "infected by satans curse".

The only thing that is considered "right" or "ok" sexually for them is to be commited in a long term relationship with one guy.

Even worse - Many women even LIE and say they have a boyfriend when they dont really have one, just because of fear they will be considered "sluts" or "unfaithful" when they have no guy.

This is the society conditioning though, but in reality as we already know people are DRIVEN BY EMOTIONS not logic (again), and if a woman is in a "relationship" with a guy who doesn't fill her sexual desires she WILL look for better options, yet always have that inner voice pop up in her mind and tell her it is wrong though.

What can we do about it ?
First are a couple of crucial things to have in your mind next time this happends to you in field.

The first and most important thing you MUST realize here is that IT IS OK FOR A WOMAN TO BE HAPPY AND SEXUALLY SATISFIED !
And it is not right for her to keep staying in a terrible sexual relationship she doesn't even enjoy. She is a human afterall, and if she isnt happy in her relationship she has every right to end it.

The second and most important thing you MUST realize here is that it is NO ONE'S RIGHT TO JUDGE A WOMAN'S SEX LIFE !
Because today they judge her for this guy, tommorow they judge her for that date she went out with, the other day they judge her for the guy in the disco she sent eye contact to, and not only that she isn't loyal to herself, nor loyal to the poor guy himself - she keeps staying loyal to OTHER PEOPLE'S EXPECTATIONS FROM HER ! How will she feel tommorow if all those other people get married and she stays on her own ? Will they stop judging her ? Of course not.
Who's sex life is she here to fulfill - her own or others ?

The third thing to realize is that SHE IS ADULT ENOUGH TO LISTEN TO HERSELF AND MAKE HER OWN DECISIONS ! No one knows herself way she does and no one feels what she feels. Many times the advices she got from her parents or her "girlfriends" are advices that those people will never do themselves if they were in a similiar situation like her. And women KNOW that other women have no word, so fuck it.


I brought these realizations in here to not only shed a light on better understanding it from her point of view, but more so to shed a light over YOUR POINT OF VIEW on the whole "boyfriend" bullshit.

It is a social definition, thats all.

In reality it is simply the first sexually available guy she got introduced with and stays with him simply because there are no better options presented, and to fulfill others expectations from her. It is not even marriage, just a comfortable and available sexual partner in the mask of a "boyfriend" to look good in others eyes, thats all.

Just ignore the "boyfriend" bullshit and realize that all she's really trying to do is show you she is a good girl and that she is "ok" socially.

Always assume you are better than him and she only stays with him because she has no other options, or otherwise all of them creep out as soon as they hear her "boyfriend" excuse, and dont realize she may be terribly sexually frustrated or even more she's not even AWARE about how bad her sex life really is, yet keep saying that she has a boyfriend because of her inner society voice coming in her mind that tells her to say it whenever she is TURNED ON, actually.

Also as an analogy in sales, when you come to offer a customer a Ferrari, and he GOT the money to allow it, yet tells you that he already have a Fiat Uno 94 model currently, you will not tell him "Oh ok thanks" and leave off, you will tell him "Wow man you will really want to get rid of it once you see our car !" to get him curious enough to take a "test drive" in it and be convinced himself.

In the case of a woman and a boyfriend, its almost the same case : You will want to tell her "You will want to get rid of him once you see me in action !", but you can also get her to imagine how great you are & feel curious about finding it out in other ways so she will then be likely to think : "Hmmm this guy really sounds promising, makes me feel curious about him, i want to find out more about him !".

Hope this helped.

leedrag0n